Last week I barely slept at all. The tossing and turning began on Tuesday night. I went to bed at a decent hour but my mind was not at ease. On some level, I knew I was taking burdens to bed. The thing is: these weren’t even my burdens. They were burdens of friends, family members, and church sisters and brothers who confided in me. Sometimes I pray the words of Bob Pierce, “Let my heart be broken with the things that break the heart of God” and sometimes I pray the words of Rom. 12: 15 so I might rejoice with those who rejoice and mourn with those who mourn. There was a lot of mourning going on. I had been praying throughout the day, but did not pray before going to bed.
I’m starting to think this “pray without ceasing” thing is a literal need and responsibility. Praying keeps me humble. It reminds me that God is God and I am not. Most importantly, prayer allows me to take my burdens to the Lord and LEAVE them there. I was so tired that I spent the whole night trying to force myself back to sleep when I should have gotten up to pray. Better to lose one night’s rest than to lose the entire week’s worth.
There was another reason for my uneasiness. I had a message that needed to get out. I’ll be giving the message at our Women’s Mentoring Dinner in May. God had been speaking to me over the past few months on the topic of the message: love, but the words started to flow into me in the wee hours of the morning. Seriously, God? I don’t know why God gives me words in the most awkward situations, as he frequently does when I’m in the shower. Continue reading »
One thing I have learned in the last few months is the importance of rest. In my professional career, rest was not given priority. As a matter of fact, the people who rested were perceived as lazy or out of touch with reality. I recall a fellow seminary student asking me last year if sleep was a waste of my time. I replied, “It used to be.” How can one sleep when there is so much to do? Clearly, I was the one who was out of touch.
